Lord, Have Mercy

This post is the result of personal experience and deep reflection.

When our friends and loved ones are sick, we pray for healing. That is the normal thing to do.

But while praying for healing, the condition got worse, from stage 3 to stage 4 to end stage cancer, from stage 3 to stage 7 to end stage Alzheimer's, from grade 2 pain to grade 10 over 10 on the pain scale, we know the end is near.  We became convinced, became 200% sure, that praying for healing is not according to God's will anymore.  When a case has deteriorated till the pain is beyond bearable, as advised by a priest, beseech God for His mercy.

The daughter of this internet friend had cancer, and despite everything they do, had reached the stage of grade 10 over 10 on the pain scale. The doctor finally advised her to let go since even experimental drugs had no effect, let alone morphine and other painkillers. Finally after 4 years, she rest in peace.

My own father, also with cancer, left 3 years ago. I asked God for his healing. But it got worse and after 6 months, he told the palliative doctor that it was 9, sometimes 10 over of 10 on the pain scale. On the final days, he sat at the sink and cough out blood every few minutes.  We all let go - we do not pray for healing anymore, but for mercy and a peaceful journey.

I have some other personal experiences, but it is unnecessary to cite them.

On the way to the cross, Jesus did not ask God to spare Him.  He fully understood His purpose and acted according to God's will.

Yes.  We pray for healing when we are sick.  But if circumstances relentlessly point in the opposite direction despite fervent prayers for healing, then, "Lord have mercy, Thy will be done".

In moments like this, I need You, Lord

I am not sure whether this is too personal to be captured in my blog. But I shall write anyway.
My eldest sister has just been diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia. She is feeble, and the illness appears to be terminal with months remaining.

She is not prepared to died. In fact, she hopes to live for another several years. She is a non-christian. She does not have the assurance of salvation through Jesus Christ. She has little hope.
It is a trying time for her children, and us her siblings. None of us are rich enough to manage the cost of advanced medical treatment.

In moments like this, I could only pray for her. Lord have Mercy. Grant her a miraculous recovery. Touch her heart. Grant her your grace.
In moments like these, we ask God "Why she was inflicted?". "Why my family, Lord?"
In moments like this, we want God to be more real, to be nearer, to answer "Yes" to our prayers. Not "No" or "Maybe". We want God to take charge and grant us the miracle that we pray for. Not to let nature take its course.
In moments like this, Lord, You are Sovereign, have Mercy...